Ambitions and future aspirations can wait...
It started last Monday.
Well, at least for me it did.
I snapped a little.
I know its not your fault,
but I just can't help it.
I know its no one's fault.
Just mine.
Why did I have to go and think so much ?
I've been waiting week after week.
Every Monday,
I'd wait at the library after school for you.
But ever since the term started,
you had other agendas to attend to.
Its not your fault.
Its my fault.
I was the one who declined your offer to talk.
I wanted to play Mr Nice Guy.
I know you didn't mean it.
In fact,
you didn't do anything wrong.
I was just overthinking things.
And that got me here.
Miserable.
I thought I could let it go.
I thought I did let it go.
But talking to you today made me realise.
Everything has changed.
We used to talk every Monday.
One on one.
You broke barriers and I closed gaps.
It was fun.
I enjoyed our time together.
But today was different.
I know you're feeling under the weather.
But something just didn't feel right.
When you told me about your relative's broken collar bone,
I couldn't care less.
I forced an 'ouch'.
Because I didn't know what to say.
The walls are once again.
We talked.
But I still feel miserable.
I don't feel what I felt before anymore.
And I don't know what to say anymore.
What we have now is but a professional relationship.
You have your work.
And I have mine.
Good bye.
It was nice knowing you,
Jack.
Listening to Something's Gotta Give - OneRepublic
And I can picture it after all these days,
And I know its long gone,
And that magic's not here no more,
And it might be okay,
But I'm not fine at all.
I was there,
I remember it all too well.
Feeling lost.
TK
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